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touch of painted curls
river down under 
7th-Apr-2004 03:12 pm
dragons
It's understood. Hanging sweetly in the air
No under-rug swept. But so often
If you still talkin' about it, you haven't got it.
(but do what you have to do)
inline questioning, save some cycles
You will need them.

Analysis of last post's poem
I was thinking about cheap wine, about who drinks it, and why. About the slide of every upper class into the lower, to be replaced by a new definition of upper. Expensive products cheapened for the masses; make way for new expensive products. Does this bother me? No, not really. It's still good. How do I drink? Rarely, deeply, always. I love the idea of burning clean. Drink the wine or torch it, either way distills. Accept or don't, each way a choice, each way progress, the process is everything. White flame between colors, burning brightly is the high, the spark, the flow, the dance. Momentum between stills, balance of speed over time, it's so close to rhythm. And then push it, take it too far, test the limit, find the edge to know where you want to be. See from all sides, find comfort in the void, rest anywhere the cat's paws leave you. And I'm loving it, bring it on. Break me, in crystal-cast colors, let the pieces slide, melt and reform. A kiss with change. I see you. I love the end.

And no, I'm not intoxicated. High on nothing. ;)

Jealousy is rarely the problem. Security is. The important bit is how one feels about oneself, and how those feelings are affected by the person you're with. Do I want to believe there's more to it than that? Mayybe.

You is everyone, you is someone.
She's a flickering image of a person I knew.

There's always more.
Comments 
(Deleted comment)
7th-Apr-2004 02:40 pm (UTC)
Thank you! :) You're not far away, it seems. :)

*asks you for a dance* :)
*bounce* vroom. :)
8th-Apr-2004 10:31 am (UTC)
"Jealousy is rarely the problem. Security is." Such a trigger for thought.

To me, and from my observations, jealousy seems to have something to do with non-consensual ownership. (Consensual ownership doesn't seem to get quite the same reactions.) I rarely feel that either.

Security.. for me the fear of loss. *That* I feel.

And self-esteem.. it is amazing how much self-esteem affects our destiny. We create totally different realities based on what we believe we are, and are capable of.

Perhaps you are high on everything (just no artificial triggers)? ;)

Thank you for a good think. *:)
8th-Apr-2004 09:31 pm (UTC)
There you are! *hugs* Welcome to my humble adobe. :) Yay commenting. :)

I have more to write on the topic of security / self-esteem / confidence. For some time, I've been cataloguing the people I interact with on the subject. It's interesting how they and I compare. How is that for vague? :) Along the same lines, in what ways am I drawn to people who are similar to me, and in what ways different? :)

I'm very secure about some things (Heh.. I considered "to the point of arrogance", but oddly, that's often a sign of the other end of the spectrum. Past the point of arrogance? Heh. Moving on. ;) But mine has some gaping holes, too. I'm working on those. I can be patient with some insecurities, but in general, it is something I like to squish, as I've found it to be incredibly destructive, or at least not so good. ;)

> We create totally different realities based on what we believe we are, and are capable of.

Well put. :)

*bows*
10th-Apr-2004 03:00 pm (UTC)
*poof* Indeed, here I am. This moment anyway. ;)

*hugspurrr* Thank you.

>I have more to write on the topic of security / self-esteem / confidence. For some time, I've been cataloguing the people I interact with on the subject. It's interesting how they and I compare. How is that for vague? :)

*grin* Heh. Vague, but not.

I would love to hear what you have discovered so far. It is an amazingly fundamental yet complex topic. (How's that for sounding intellectual about it. ;)

> Along the same lines, in what ways am I drawn to people who are similar to me, and in what ways different? :)

Hmm. Yes. *lots of thought*

And additionally.. in what ways are we drawn to others for reasons that are "good" for us, and in what ways "bad"? (Which, I guess, ties right back into self esteem and security; which perhaps is your point.)

On arrogance: I have found that some people think me arrogant when I am simply secure in myself. But I know what you mean - true arrogance is frequently a sign of insecurity; the need to try to force a reality on others to make it feel more valid.

>I can be patient with some insecurities, but in general, it is something I like to squish, as I've found it to be incredibly destructive, or at least not so good. ;)

I once hear it said that all decisions are either based in fear or.. (well they said love, but I think there is a better concept that applies there.)

Ah, to live a life without fear. Wouldn't it be amazing with no insecurities? The potential of humankind unleashed.
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